Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
so much tequila, so little girl.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize