please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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