Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
