i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
