So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
