I can't watch pbs sober anymore
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
