So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
