do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
false alarm. still invincible.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
