so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
