He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
