i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
where are you?
Hypothermia
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
