so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
