After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
