he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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