Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
