have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
