Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
This is my gift to your gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize