Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
