Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize