After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
