I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
