I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
