tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Randomize
