Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize