I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
