I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize