with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
