Porn is love you can see.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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