handjob tips. give me some.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
