He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
i've created a new STD.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize