All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
