i love accidental penises.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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