Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
it's like heaven, but drunker
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize