Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
