I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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