Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
