just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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