is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I'm both gender and math confused
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
