if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
