In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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