youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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