you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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