Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
