I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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