Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
