I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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