Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
