I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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