He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
