If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
