nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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